By Jack Densmore, TX

The famed Wisconsin mascot, the “Spirit Cow,” was left behind when Wisconsin began their trip to the mountain. In previous years, the Spirit Cow has faced the worst of days, yet only this year he was forgotten.

“He was not kidnapped,” Wisconsin delegate Luke Kokinos said. “He was forgotten. Somebody left him at home.”

Monday evening, the cow returned to the mountain via overnight shipping, only to be later lost.

“Well, nobody is trying to steal it,” Kokinos said. “Nobody is trying to assault it so we’re thinking that Wisconsin might be the safest place for the Spirit Cow for future years.”

Of course, the Wisconsin delegation does have plans for a substitute mascot in place of the Spirit Cow. Hopefully, this new mascot will see better days for Wisconsin than his forgotten cousin.

“There will be a body double for the Spirit Cow,” Kokinos said. “So, in the case of another assassination attempt, it won’t actually affect our real state mascot.”

“There will be a body double for the Spirit Cow,” Kokinos said. “So, in the case of another assassination attempt it won’t actually affect our real state mascot.”

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